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One's mind is creating neural pathways by simple repeated thoughts and or
actions. Where are your thoughts leading you? How disciplined are any of us
about where our minds or bodies are pointing? WRAP is a meme that serves as a
reminder to keep positive energy surroundings one's goals. The WRAP formula
signifies the importance of wanting (goals), remembering the importance of
attitude and of course persistence.
Wanting one's goals while keeping a positive attitude about trying and often
failing is easy to claim and hard to live. Failure might mean you learned but
perhaps it hurt. Remembering this double-edged sword is useful. Now you know
more about where to bend and where to stand. Reflections help one to mentally
practice for the future. Those who are persistence know about the long wait.
It is no big deal. Those willing to thoughtfully experiment can often achieve
big results.
Trial and error learning increases the ability to perform well above
expectations. In fact being able to be vulnerable and make mistakes by
trying may be one of the hallmarks for later success in life. This is due
to our species history of surveying under-charging conditions. There has to
be failure. Again, no big deal, our brains are designed for survival.
Survivors are good at guessing in an uncertain world.
Many books have been written concerning attitudes and the importance of
beliefs in performance. In addition to these older ideas Family Systems
Theory offers a few new ideas. Those interested in peak performance have to
be able to withstand the winds of praise and blame in important
relationships. The ability to manage self in relationships is crucial to
performance. Therefore the ability to continually separate out a more mature
self from relationships feedback is an ongoing challenge.
There are at least four steps involve in the process of separating out a more
distinct and hopefully more mature self. If people can be clear about these
four steps there is more reason to believe that the chances for success have
increased exponentially. Preparing the brain for action involves integrating
old feelings of hesitation or fear and memories of past failures into the new
plans that one wishes to achieve. The more one prepares the better the brain
is prepared to change. Preparation is about the same thing as doing as far as
the firing of brain cells is concerned. Think it and it is happening at least
at a neuronal level.
1) Goals and Costs: Being clear within oneself about what one wants to
accomplish. To be clear it is often helpful to outline the cost and benefits
of the actions. Change coast people. It is good to try and predict how it will
cost you or your loved ones. You might not be right but guessing prepares you
for uncertainty.
2) The Action Step: One has to communicate these written down goals to the
larger system by an action. Talk is not enough and can be counter productive.
It is best to keep important ideas to yourself until you are prepared to act.
If you do need feedback then you are probably just at an earlier stage of
preparation. The main idea is the actions must be taken for you not to
benefit or do something for or to others.
3) Recognize the System: People are reacting to one another constantly. Non
verbal monitoring is ongoing when people are bound together. It can be family
ties; work issues or social causes but we need one another so there will
always be reactivity.
Reactivity simply shows up. When one changes the others notice and will react
in some negative way. This is the signal that acknowledges that the system
has changed. It has to happen. The degree of reactivity tells you what type
of system you are dealing with. If it is a highly over-involved system and
people are very dependent on one another for agreement then the negative
reactions may be huge to any small change.
4) The System Reorganizes: If the one who sets a goal is willing to wait out
the reactivity without falling into a counter reaction, then real changes
might work their way through the system. Perhaps a good metaphor would be of
an orchestra in which a new instrument is integrated into the group. Everyone
shifts just slightly to make way. If the new instrument has a lead part then
this may put more stress on the others to harmonize. In fact it may take
longer for each person to tune up before the whole group can again play in
some degree of harmony.
Please see the article Theoretical
Implications of Neurofeedback Integrating Bowen Theory
by Andrea Maloney-
Schara,LCSWA for more details on EEG Neurofeedback and references.
The E2 is a small portable alpha trainer available for home training.
People can and have used Alpha training in order to define goals, to manage
the reactivity in important relationships, or to become more intellectually or
physically flexible.
Alpha training is useful to reflect on one's internal goals and to devise a
plan to achieve goals. It takes time by oneself to find one's true goals.
There are many expectations and pressures to perform that are put on each of
us. These outside pressures can mask our internal goals.
The Training Process: Initially a three generation family history is taken to
look at patterns and process in the larger system. Secondly an EEG baseline
is used to gather information on the brain wave patterns during focused
attention states. There are two types of focused attention one is internal
and the other external. Both are important. One can train for eyes open
focused attention states and for eyes closed internal attention states. Each
base line is done for five minutes. The feedback is visual and auditory. Real
time feedback allows the brain to learn at lighting fast speeds. It allows
one to go to different states of consciousness immediately. This then gives
people an experience.
Experience is the best teacher. One can talk all day about different mental
states and not create the mental state in self or in another person. However
computer driven, real time feedback guides the individuals into different
states of mental alertness.
Guidelines for using the E2.
The feedback is provided by the activation of the leads, which are attached to
the person and the E2trainer. A blue band is provided to keep the rear lead in
place. The blue ear clips go on the outside of the ears and the long thin blue
piece is inserted under the headband. One needs only a cup of warm water with
a teaspoon of salt to activate the leads. Alpha occurs naturally when one
closes their eyes. The occipital lobe, in the back of the head, is the
storehouse for visual neurons. It is also right above the cerebellum and
therefore connects the neural substrates for movement and vision. This is one
well-developed hypothesis concerning why one trains at this particular spot.
Alpha waves are far more dominant in the rear than in the front of the brain.
In fact alpha in the left frontal lobe has been reported to be associated with
depression.
On the E2 trainer box there is a power on switch, and another switch to test
the electrode connections to see if a signal is there. All training takes
place at 10 Hz, which is called the frequency. This is the midline for alpha
and has often been associated with feelings of well being and heightened
thinking states. The frequency is set at 10 Hz. Then the other dial is
called the threshold. This is the number that will vary over the training
time.
The goal is to increase the strength and therefore the height of the alpha
waves. Strength is noted by an increase in the threshold. To train you need
at least a 50% reward for producing the alpha. To begin the training one can
put the threshold at 0 just to make sure that there is adequate feedback when
one closed their eyes. Gradually the threshold can be raised to a point where
one can hear 50% positive feedback. The noise is telling the person that they
are doing well and that the 10 alpha is occurring. If one were to get tired
and go to sleep the feedback would discontinue. The lack of noise often wakes
people up just as though someone had yelled at them. Once the feedback is
judged to be adequate one can get onto the business of letting go and watching
the development of an internal focus.
There are many relaxation techniques to help establish success. Breathing
is a central technique in many meditative traditions. There are other
techniques that have been developed to help people get into and stay in the
"zone" to enhance performance. Many of these techniques are based on
breathing and watching physical sensations. Eventually the body becomes more
important than the mind. At least for a few minutes each day the mind is
lead by the calm body. Any technique that has been used in the past may be
used again. The machine simply reinforces that one is in and can maintain a
deeply relaxed state.
The experience with the alpha trainer usually takes about 30 minutes per day.
The training process requires that one keep a record of the date and the
length of the time of the training, the frequency number and how the time was
experienced. Goals can also be tracked and measured.
Contact with the Coach:
The individual commits to charting progress and maintains monthly contact.
The expectation is that the individual will complete 50 hours of training over
the course of several months. A few people are able to maintain thirty
minutes of practice daily while others begin at ten or fifteen minutes several
times a week. Each person is unique.
EXAMPLES:
The following are a few descriptions of issues encountered from the lives of
people who have tried and liked the alpha experience. Alpha is a natural state
and can be enhanced with training. It can promote a calmer body which is an
anchor for mental ability to reflect more neutrally on one's thinking and
behavior. Increased awareness can also produce feelings of vulnerability during
the process. Overall it takes discipline to self regulate.
Example 1
Mrs. B is an organizational consultant. Her business is at a point where more
demands are being made on her time and energy. Too much business is being
sent her way. Now, she must decide how to expand her business and be
reasonable about the cost to her family and life style. More business will
involve more travel and time away from home. Her clients have positive things
to say about her and her business has been growing for some time in an orderly
way. Her family says its up to her. Being aware of her own desire to grow
and develop she has begun consulting and has trained with a home unit for six
weeks. Family History: Married for thirty years she has raised has three
children. She went to school to receive an advanced degree when her children
were in high school. Now they have moved away from home. The oldest
daughter is married the other two are single and working. They all live in
cities about an hour or two away. Her husband runs a successful family farm.
He is an only child and both his parents have died in the last four years.
The three generational diagram shows that she is an oldest daughter with a
sister and a youngest brother. Her mother died several years ago and her
father remarried. The brother has been the one with the majority of challenges
in her nuclear family. She has a fair knowledge of her grandparents and their
siblings and maintains contact with a few people in her extended family.
The following letter describes her process.
Dear Andrea,
There are a lot of questions - here are some facts.
I was using the E2- every day for 20-30min. After you left the area, Oct.15th.
I practiced for the next three weeks. Then I felt that I was changing too
fast and only practiced several times the next week. During this time I
observe a lot of changes. Breathing and posture were more important to me.
The outside world seemed more alive. I notice the birds singing loudly. Was
my hearing changing? It was autumn and the farm animals were taken in to be
slain. For the first time I face this experience with my body.
I saw death and blood at a symbolic level. I realized in some deep way the
interdependence of life. I was very aware of the feeding and taking care of
the animals and what they were in turn giving to my family and me. I can not
explain this to others. People will think that I am becoming too different.
Being "one with nature" has a different meaning to me but its too difficult to
talk about with others about this. I though about talking to my husband and
though it would be too difficult.
I notice the little things in my business and in my marriage. This is all
occurring in a completely new way. There was pain and there was promise. I
was not mad or sad. I could see both sides in my mind's eye with my body
calm. It was still painful to see a new truth but my body was calmer and I
did not get upset with others about what I had understood. There are a lot of
things that fit into this different way of seeing life. So I will try and
outline the important ones.
I am a part of the system even though I am trying to be a thoughtful, more
neutral person I am usually reacting to what I do not like. Judgment is
everywhere. The training helped me see how I was involved in side taking.
In consulting to organizations I could see how the other people related to me
without reacting as much to the difficulties they faced. So far the people who
hire me has not noticed the subtle changes.
At a family level, I had a long talk with my father about becoming too distant
from his family. I may have bugged him about it. He decided to take a trip
with me to reconnected with one of his family. When we arrived he was primed
with memories. All of us talked about the neglect of one another that seemed
somehow just a part of life. We also talked about the values of our family
and the desire to be in better touch. On the way home I was able to talk
about old hurts. In other words I let some of the old ghosts out with my
father. It was relatively easy to do, as I had thought about some of this in
my training time.
This episode with my father then enabled me to talk to my husband. He was
slightly interested in it as he cares for my father. Then I slipped in a
comment about our distance. He ended the conversation and returned to the
barn. I suppose that made me aware of how cautious I am with my husband.
Perhaps I am spooking him or is it him me? Now I am more aware of my own
behavior and life.
The first conclusion is that I have to think carefully before I act
differently but I want to go on with my life and not force others to change
or to upset them too much.
The issue with my husband is like my work. How should I go to a new level of
complexity? He and I have the empty nest. We have our work. At first I was
ashamed that I had not seen how this has allowed us to become so distant from
one another. Now I have faced the fact that I play a central part in my
husband not being able to be reasonable about his work hours. Perhaps I will
know the answer later. For now I have to take a different step to face my own
fear and role in this. To come to this point seems so easy. I can tell you it
has not been so. I still have to face the reality that my life is dependent on
me. I don't know what my life will be, but I am more prepared to face the
uncertainty. So you see I have had help from the E2, but it has also causes
me pain. Sometimes I wonder if it will lead me to a better life? What I do
know is that this process has lead me to a more honest and reality oriented
point. I hope that it is OK that I am using the machine a bit less than in the
first month.
Dear B.
Whenever the experience of becoming more aware starts to intensify negative
feeling states, then, as you did, it is probably a good clue that you can cut
back till you are more comfortable. Some people just say it is a discipline
and keep going. That is OK for them just as your decision is OK for you.
The same sort of thing can happen to people who have back pain. They have
been tense for so long that they have lost the feeling in the muscles. Then
when they begin to relax the blood flows into that area again. When the
feelings start to come back they are often experienced as pain. That is no
reason to quit or to try harder it is simply part of the growing respect for
your body and brain.
As you gradually integrate these feeling states you will have less pain and be
able to make more thoughtful decisions. Overall the more there is an
acceptance of the past the more energy that is available to live in the
present.
It appears that seasonal change is spreading through out your family. There
have been quite a few losses in your families and perhaps people have
recovered enough to go on and reestablish contact with those they had no time
for before. This new contact with your father's family may indicate that the
changes were in effect before you began to train with the machine. In
addition to the family process you are in a position to see how to be useful
to your dad as he begins to reconnect to important people in his family. I am
sure that you will benefit from his effort. You are paying a price to drive
him here and there and so is he. Since you are both willing to pay the price
to listen to one another there is much that will be gained. This does not
mean that life will be all sunshine, after all either he or you can still take
a few wrong turns. But overall you are slowing down the tendency for people
to cut off from one another over the generations and this is to the long term
good for the future of your family.
I do not know your husband's side of the story. I hear you say that you can
see more of the distance between the two of you. Therefore I would try and
address the tension that you have in as funny and as un-uptight a way as I
could. I do remember that his parents both recently died and he may still be
in some emotional thing with that experience. In addition you are part of the
"change" generation. Parents disappearing at one end and children leaving
home at the other. Things do not remain static in nature.
How to talk to him seems to be your central question. I am for using dreams
as a communication tool when you are ready. If you dream about his parents
let him know and see what he says about them. If one does not know what is
going on then one just has to guess. Distant marriages spawn guessing. Most
of the time it goes underground. The marital ground can get very soggy and
it's hard to plant new ideas. If you verbalize the guess then there is a
greater ability to drain the land and plant the seeds. As you said so well,
people do not talk, as they fear upsetting the other or themselves. As long
as you do not insist that your guess is right he may be able to talk with you
for a minute of so. That is plenty to start. A spark can start a forest
fire. Therefore I would say keep going without reacting to his signals but be
gentle with your guesses. One guess a week is probably OK in a distant
marriage.
In conclusion it appears that you are doing better in the midst of seeing an
awful lot of what has been hidden. As a result there is a certain longing for
more certainty. Small price to pay. One always pays a price but it is not
often that one faces their life.
All the best to you and yours too. Andrea
Example 2
Mrs. C. is a 33-year-old woman who works on Wall Street and was interested
in training to be a marathon runner. She has been interested in Peak
Performance and stress reduction. The new findings on the brain and
biochemistry are very exciting to her and she has an intellectual
understanding of how this fits into what she knows about meditation. From
an early age has known that she likes setting and achieving goals and that
she also has the classic overachiever response. Nothing is ever good
enough. Being self-critical has not helped her achieve goals but she now
reports this as the chief drain on her energy.
High achievers generally are good at stating goals; however if one is running
on too much beta in the brain there may be a lack of alpha which enable the
individual to be aware and receptive to the environment. The level of stress
in trying to achieve is not counterbalance by a lack of tension in
performance. One can achieve but it is costly.
It was simple for Mrs. C to put out four mental goals and one physical goal.
Overall the idea is that she was ready to go through a big change, physically
and mentally.
Her first goal is to have more overall awareness of the world around her. She
says that she is being rewarded for tunnel vision and wants to broaden her
horizons. The second goal is to increase positives self-talk. The negative
mental thought processes are wearing her down. This alone she believes could
conserve her energy. The third goal is to increase her sense of humor. The
fourth is to understand her family relationships without being critical. She
would like to use the E2 to help her with these mental goals. She was also
curious if the E2 might help her physical performance during the marathon
training.
Mrs. C used the E2 for four weeks, five times a week. She practiced with eyes
open and eyes closed. She reported that her exercise routine was easier and
that she was able to keep her weight steady and that she was sleeping better.
In addition she noticed that she was more engaged with people at work and was
less critical of herself. She had an insight in watching her Dad deal with
stress and seeing that he was using some of her own methods. This made her
realize that it could be a family trait and perhaps unlearnable. At least she
was not so critical of her self when she saw the same behavior in others.
Her next challenge came from her husband's family. His parents came to stay
for a long weekend and she became focused on her mother-in-law. This is a
woman who seemed to have a gift for saying the wrong thing and doing the wrong
thing and not wanting to accept responsibility. Her husband allows his mother
to go on an on and then complain to her about his mother. It made it hard to
watch this mother son interaction and in addition she feels unsure as to how
to handle her emotional reactivity to this ongoing drama. She realized that
she was hooked into being critical of what was essentially a stressful
situation. Perhaps this was the best they could do and if she was critical
mentally she was adding another layer of difficulty to the challenge her
husband faced with his Mom. After talking this over she decided to let her
husband handle his mother as best he could and give him a pat on the back for
whatever he could achieve. The idea came to her as she recognized the
importance of positive feedback in learning this new skill. The E 2 is always
set to give 50% positive feedback for learning and he said she was giving her
husband nothing but negative feedback so how could he learn? Now she was a
bit freer to concentrate on her training for the marathon as it was only two
weeks away. She was able to visualize herself running at a faster pace and
this seemed to help her performance.
Although she finished the marathon in a better time during the recovery
periods she found herself lapsing back into self-criticism. She thought she
could have done better. She saw this judgment loop coming back into her mind
and found that it was difficult to continue training on the E2 for the first
few days after the race. She had lost a bit of forward momentum and now had
to regain her centered space. Two weeks later the time changed to eastern
standard and she had to up an hour earlier for work. This seems to also throw
off her ability to practice with the E2.
Of course there were other stressors. Her brother announced plans to marry
within six weeks. Her parents were in the midst of selling the old family
home and moving to another state. In her opinion there was too much stress
for her to continue the training until after the wedding. Her comment was
that she saw the relationship between the patterns of neuronal wiring in her
brain that was similar to the habit patterns in her family. She could see
relationships from a better perspective but did not have enough of a sense of
humor right now to get through all of the family changes. Her brain would
just have to wait a bit longer to undergo more self-directed change. Her fall
back position is to listen to audio tapes and continue to learn to reduce
tension. This is also a common experience for people. Alpha makes people
more relaxed and more receptive to the tension and confusion around them so
one has to weigh the cost benefit ratio of change and go at the pace that is
comfortable for each individual. Each brain is different and so one must
learn to set there own pace. In this case I am sure there will be more to
report at a later time.
Example 3
Letter from D.
Dear Andrea,
This is work! It is a new way of seeing how much time I spend thinking about
other stuff, other people, etc.etc. and how hard it is to focus on self. It
requires an awful lot of discipline -- for me, anyway. But well into my
third week, I think I'm walking straighter, sleeping less, feeling more
alert and paying more attention to me, my reactions and my contributions
(for good or for bad, purposeful or inadvertent) to given situations.
It seems to offer a new way of understanding Bowen Theory's notion of
focusing on self and defining a self for self, rather than being defined by
the environment or relationships.
Very interesting.
Hope you are doing well,
Regards,
D
Once a day find 10 minutes without interruption to have time for yourself.
This can also be done before bed. When you are in a comfortable position
place your hands on your belly where deep breathing originates. Watching
breathing is the most important technique in many meditative traditions.
Please notice the warm feeling of your hands on your belly then make sure
that the top hand can move.
Close eyes and recall other feelings of relaxation. Experience the feeling
of your hand or fingers floating up. Notice that the power of the mind is
producing these feelings. Say to yourself something like; "I am taking 3
slow breaths to allow the floating feeling to spread throughout my body."
Count slowly to allow your body to relax until you are in a very calm state.
Notice the warmth and floating feelings spread first to your hands, then
arms, shoulders, neck, jaw, eyes, forehead, face, and then begin to go back
down to chest, your upper back, lower back, hips, legs to knees, knees to
feet and finally toes.
Now let all the tension go. Some people visualize the tension going out of the
body.
If there are areas that are tense go back to those areas and breath into tense
areas.
Remind your self that your mind knows how to relax and let go and that when
your body is calm your mind is strong and ready for new ideas. Suggest the
goals you want to accomplish what you want to feel or experience the
relaxation effect; see it happening in your mind's eye. Then suggest that at
count of 5 you will be fully awake. Count back from 5, at count of 2 eyes
will open and you will be fully awake and alert, feeling good refreshed and
ready for the day. If you do this in the evening before bed just suggest
that after the "seeding" and seeing the goals accomplished you will drift
off to a deep sleep and awake refreshed.
If you want to remember your dreams you may also include that suggestion at
the beginning of the relaxation. Please keep a bit of paper by your bed if
you are interested in remembering your dreams. Just by associating ideas to
your dreams you may understand more about how your mind works. There is no
one right way to analyze dreams. Dreams are mostly a function of memory
storage and emotions. If you have issues in your dreams you can rework them
in the early morning light as you wish the dream to be.
Organizational or individual consultation is available.
For individual times please contact by E-mail: ARMS711@aol.com
PEAK PERFORMANCE
Andrea Maloney-Schara, LCSWA
THE E2 AND ALPHA TRAINING
People who are high achievers have been able to work this type of program with
minimal contact. In fact, once a mouth contact is all that is suggested.
Some people are still consulting to other therapist and this is also fine.
Neurofeedback is considered and adjunct to many types of therapy. However
there are also people who are not in any type of therapy who are just
interested in maximizing potential. This training program is able to fit with
many different types of people.
Self -Regulation and Stress Reductions, Some Commonly Used
Suggestions
by Andrea Maloney-Schara, LCSA
Or call Andrea Maloney-Schara,LSWA 202-965-0730